


Bloodsport

by orphan_account



Category: Lost Girl, Mass Effect
Genre: CopDoc - Freeform, F/F, doccubus
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-18
Updated: 2015-01-26
Packaged: 2018-02-13 18:08:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 17,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2160096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The year is 2172 CE. Lauren Lewis is serving the Systems Alliance and fighting for her planet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prelude

**Author's Note:**

> A.N.: This is my first completely AU story, so please be kind. I love the Mass Effect series and the beautiful expansive world they have created for us gamers and there was no better way to honour both the brilliant minds of Mass Effect & Lost Girl but to make it into a (hopefully epic and enjoyable) mash-up. And while I'm completely #TeamDoccubus, I like mixing things up a bit so warning for the hardcore shippers: it starts with Copdoc and may include more Copdoc, but it's mainly Lauren-centric. Go go, action Lauren!

**Prelude**

The year is 2172 CE. Human and fae have successfully sent expeditions across the Sol system. Explorations beyond Pluto have yielded knowledge that there is life outside of the system, in the depths of the Milky Way.

The Dark and Light divide still exists, even in the rest of the galaxy. The archaic laws have been blurred a little as both the humans and the fae on Earth worked towards expanding their territory. The ties between the two species living on the same planet have reached a point where hiding was no longer necessary. The humans and the fae on Earth have formed the Systems Alliance, the umbrella corporation that encompassed military, exploratory, and economical leads. This also gave way to overpopulation and the need to branch out to find settlements amongst the stars.

This rapid expansion caught the interest of the Council, a group of High Elders that resided on the Citadel, a bustling space station that housed many different species of fae. The original Council is made up of several high ranking fae, five from the Light and five from the Dark, all of whom were elected into positions. The new Council included a new addition: three additional seats were given to the humans to choose who would best represent them.


	2. The Villian

**2172 CE** ::  **Eagle Nebula - Tasale - Illium**

She took aim and fired. A smirk graced her lips as the claw found its mark, embedding itself into the wall. She gave it a terse tug and nodded to herself, satisfied with the results. Fastening the other end of the metal cord, she tested its tautness before hopping onto the wire skillfully. Three deep breaths and she began placing one foot in front of the other, just as she had practiced.

She reminded herself not to look down, though she knew that the five-storey drop would simply give her a fracture and medigel could fix that in an instant. But a dent in her Hahne-Kedar Shadow Works suit however… The midnight blue custom fabric armor had set her back more credits than she cared to admit, the repairs would undoubtedly cost more. She just wanted to make sure all damages were worthily sustained and not due the aftermath of her carelessness.

She wobbled and inwardly chastised herself for not paying attention. She was now in the middle of the chasm between the neutral territory and the Dark headquarters, literally walking the fine line between the two drastically different parts of the bustling hub.

On the left was part of the planet no one liked speaking of: the dark, gloomy, unlit streets of the Illium slum were not commonly known. The low-rise huts reminded her of the old India vids she borrowed from the library - cramped and overcrowded. Broken people wandered the roads, scrimping and gathering to feed families.

To her right was the tourist shot of Illium in every extranet site: the impeccable skyline of skyscrapers, carefully designed to create the impression of a large wave; the obedient lines of skycars dotting the horizon, passing in and out of buildings; the large, glaring screens displaying advertisements of all sorts.

For a moment, she wondered if all the electricity had been siphoned from the neutral zone to feed the Dark territory. If she was not so caught up in the moment, she would have appreciated the faint orange hue blanketing the busy city of Illium, both sides of it.

The momentary peacefulness only broken by the soft snores of the Underfae dobermans that laid fast asleep below her, blissfully unaware of their new visitor. An involuntary gulp escaped her lips, suddenly fearing for her life. Setting her sights on the building, she moved faster, determined to not be on the menu for tonight.

She breathed a sigh of relief as she felt the solid bannister beneath her feet. Leaping off the wire in one fluid motion, she tapped her Kuwashii visor twice, the blueprint of the compound appeared, the white lines overlaying the structure. Her eyes scanned for structural and technical weaknesses but found none. Good news for her escape route - the tightrope would be secure - but bad news for her since her lock-picking sorely needed working on.

As she jiggled the tumblers of the tinted glass door, she cursed the Dark fae's penchant for all things old-fashioned and gnarly. It was 2172 CE for crying out loud! A soft click and a softer gleeful cheer later, the handle was depressed and darkness greeted her.

A dim light surrounded her as her visor detected no light source when she closed the door behind her, shutting out the rest of the setting sun. She could hear the telltale whine of the LOKI droids patrolling downstairs. Moving quietly to the side of the door, she was about to check-in with her team.

"I see you're in," Staff Lieutenant Tamsin Sigrún immediately popped up, taking up half of the single-lens visor. She could not help but be surprised both visually and aurally by the blonde. "And I saw that flinch."

"It's a perfectly human reaction, LT," she countered. "Just be thankful my parasympathetic nervous system is still functional after all the training. I know many servicemen who are starting to develop a lack of response to th- Wait, were you tracking me?"

The blonde chuckled at the rebuttal from her apprentice, "Well, this  _is_ your final ICT mission, Lauren."

"So…?"

"So hell if I'm not going to sit back and watch you either kick ass or get your ass kicked. Look, I even brought popcorn!"

Lauren huffed in slight annoyance at her mentor as her fingers danced across her omnitool, closing the video link and retrieving the old data stored on their servers. She checked her pistol as the combined data and blueprint overlay displayed where she needed to go. What she was after was two floors down in a vault, and time was of the essence. Another deep breath for good luck before she got moving. The doors opened with a pneumatic hiss as a long hallway presented itself.

"Just keep that mic on mute unless you've got some advice to give," Lauren said as she heard the crunch of the mentioned popcorn.

"Yes, ma'am," her mentor teased, appearing on her visor a final time to throw up a mock salute before disappearing from her screen.

Rolling her eyes, Lauren padded softly across the catwalk, sticking to the shadows. The LOKI droids marched in twos while the FENRIS droids seemed to be allowed free reign of the place, zig-zagging their way through desks and shelves. She turned a corner to reveal a large, dimly lit room.

"Oh goddesses," she breathed.

Lauren made the mistake of glancing over the handrails, the sight both intrigued and horrified her. What she thought were workstations turned out to be bodies lain across steel slabs, pinned down with tubes and straps like a twisted collection of insects on display. Though light was sparse, the eerie green glow from the machines provided enough for her to notice that many more filled the room. Her curiosity was piqued.

"Lewis?" Tamsin's voice crackled over the communicator, clearly panicked at the sudden exclamation. "Lewis, sitrep."

"LOKI and FENRIS droids patrolling the area below the second-floor landing. There seems to be some sort of experiment going on in here, not sure if they are fae or human. I'm going to get a closer look."

"That's not part of your orders, Corporal. Your orders are to penetrate and retrieve."

Lauren hated this side of her mentor. On good days, the older blonde allowed her the freedom to explore and investigate, treating her no different than her other fae buddies. But on days like these, she fluctuated between being friends and colleagues so fast, she was getting whiplash. But today was the last official test of her life before she could join up with any ship she wanted. She even had a recommendation from the LT awaiting postage back in her bunk and several offers from various outposts.

"Aye, aye, ma'am," she grumbled.

As much as she wanted to follow orders, she battled with what she had been taught: to always obey because disobedience cost lives. Conflicted but still extremely curious, her nature overwhelmed nurture as she leapt off the catwalk and onto the first floor. A little look would not change anything. Just as she had expected, the bodies were not corpses but actual, breathing humanoids - or at least the machines showed. The monitors showed the basic information to the bodies they were connected to, as well as other weird machines she had never seen.

What she did not anticipate was the overpowering odour of rotting flesh. Immediately, she understood why as she held back her gasp: their skin - every inch of each body - had been expertly removed yet none of them were bleeding. Some of them had been cut open and left to rot while being artificially sustained by the AI, others had appendages missing. Upon closer inspection, Lauren realized the raw, red flesh had been poked and prodded with several needles. Anaesthetics and muscle relaxants, she guessed, looking at the colour of the fluid flowing intravenously into flesh. Most, if not all, of the bodies had their eyes open, as though intently watching a movie played on the ceiling.

Gritting her teeth, Lauren held her breath as she walked between the rows. She took note of their names, a potent reminder of how fragile life was. She made a silent promise to release them from this inhumane torture, the Dark had no right to keep anyone from ascending to Valhalla. She moved around slowly, taking in everything. Suddenly something became clear to her, hand moving to mouth in a quick motion as an attempt to stop herself from crying out loud: they were all humans, or some variation of. While there were markers for fae blood and DNA, they were more or less humans or an odd hybrid.

Using the long panel of consoles and chemicals that separated the room for support, Lauren's head reeled at the thought that someone was experimenting on her species. She knew that the fae may have been more lax with their laws. Despite the many social advances throughout the years, they still treated humans as second-class citizens. This should not have surprised her, but it did. Fingers quickly deactivating the security on the locked computers as her eyes quickly scanned through the data. Her brows furrowed as she felt herself becoming more confused as she read about Project Heka, an apparent miracle drug to be manufactured and sold. Most of the data was redacted or corrupt, making more than half of it illegible and unintelligible. But one thing did catch her eye as well as the breath in her throat: her mentor's service records.

"Everything okay, Lewis?"

Was Tamsin in danger? Or was there a more sinister explanation? Not knowing what to do with the information, she filed it away at the back of her head for further examination later. Now was not the time to have a discussion either.

"Yes, LT," Lauren lied. "Moving to the vault."

Deftly maneuvering past two droids, Lauren made her way to the hidden stairwell on the northern end of the room. Out of habit, she checked her pistol again before peeking around the corner to find a small hall and a guard stationed at the end of it. Using her omnitool she shorted out the fluorescent tube, using it as a distraction to creep past the perplexed guard.

"You know you're going to have to kill someone eventually," her mentor suddenly chipped in.

"Stop spying on me."

An amused hum was the only reply that came from the lieutenant. Lauren disregarded it and slipped behind another set of doors, making progress towards the underground vault. A glance at her wrist showed her that she was cutting a little close when she realized she had less than an hour left to disable the in-vault security system, hack the vault door, grab the case and slip back outside before the Morrigan, Ambassador Evony Marquis, returned.

Quickening her pace, she made a beeline for the vault, avoiding as many security checkpoints as she possibly could. She allowed herself a little smile, noting that everything was going according to plan so far. Though she might be slightly off schedule, her curiosity begged her to slow down and look through the systems. Balancing the urgent need get to the vault as well as her inherent inquisitiveness, she plugged in a backdoor hack so she could revisit the network after her test. Satisfied with herself and the almost-untouched state in which she left things, she made for her target.

Several turns and ridiculously high catwalks later, she arrived somewhere near the vault. Looking around for the main console, she had to move with precision due to the many lasers now dancing in her vicinity, determined to not let her grab the case sitting in the middle of the room. A confident smirk crossed her features as she brought her omnitool up, expertly weaving in and out of the programs sent to block her progress. After a few seconds of frantic typing, the security system deactivated with a slow whine. Her smirk widened as she stood and cracked her neck before striding right up to her prize.

Lauren realized her glaring mistake as soon she lifted the case. Had she been less smug, the thin glass plate would have been obvious. Despite the fact that it was hidden, she chastised herself for her carelessness; it was such an old trick! In that split second, klaxons blared as droids began dropping from the vent. She cursed and jumped backward, using the shadows as cover as she half-crawled towards the only exit in the room.

"Corporal, what in Odin's name is going on? Several hostiles have shown up on the radar."

"Pressure plates under the case," Lauren stated simply, conserving her breath for the foreseeable future. "Reaching the LZ in ten, requesting for transport."

"I'll arrange for pick-up."

Lauren muttered her thanks. She had reached the outer sanctum and was back in the experiment room again. Sending a disruption wave to the nearest droid, she watched the effect chain throughout the room, disabling every electronic machine. It finally hit one of the consoles, triggering a small EMP burst as the life-sustaining equipment began to shut down. She flinched when she saw the bodies begin to shake violently but knew that this new pain would be brief compared to the drawn-out suffering they were planned to endure.

"Sorry," she whispered as she moved past them.

Reaching the second floor, she opened the side door to find that night had descended upon the city, the orange hues now replaced by a deep purple. From her pocket, she drew two straps and attached them to the case. The magnetic straps clung on without any difficulty, allowing her to use the rest of it to loop around her body. Wearing the case now like a backpack, she stabilized herself as she climbed onto the rope. Her body was forced to swiftly get used to the new weight as the adrenaline rush propelled her forward towards freedom.

As she approached the landing zone, a dark X3M hovered over it, the Systems Alliance seal on the vehicles' sides. The stress slowly dissolving, turning into a beaming grin as she hopped into the shuttle.

"You got it?"

"What, no 'are you okay?' or 'good job'?" Lauren joked but tapped the metal case on her back anyway. "What did the Alliance want with this? What's inside it anyway?"

Tamsin stared straight ahead as she drove them away from the Dark compound, threading through the rush hour traffic, lights flying past them in a colourful blur.

"What's inside it, Tam?" Lauren shifted to place the case on her lap.

Her mentor glanced twice at her before starting, "I'm sorry, it's just that it's - "

"Above my paygrade?" Lauren offered when Tamsin shot her a look of pity. "Well, I guess I could just open it."

"And risk getting court-marshalled? Didn't think you'd be that stupid, Lewis. Anyway, time to celebrate! Odin knows I need my booze. The rest are at the Dál waiting to buy you a drink."

"This isn't over, Tam."

"Yeah, yeah," the older blonde rolled her eyes.

* * *

 **2172 CE**  ::  **Serpent Nebula - Citadel - The Dál Riata**

"Three cheers for the Doc!"

After the third wave of resounding yells and whistles, glasses were filled and the Dál settled back down into a slightly less noisy version. The soft chatter and an upbeat song continued to fill the quaint little bar.

While Tamsin had no love for the place, or its proprietor, this was the only place on the massive space station that served decent swill. Lauren, on the other hand, loved the excessive use of wood. The dim lighting added to the old charms of Earth the pub exuded. Rumour had it that Fitzpatrick McCorrigan, the owner, had shipped it to the Citadel piece by piece.

"What can I get for you ladies?" the bartender slid up to the pair.

"Two shots of Ryncol to kick off the celebrations!" Tamsin replied, a tad overenthusiastic.

Lauren could only giggle at her friend. The relationship they had bordered on dysfunctional at times, but if the past five years had taught her anything, it was that love comes in many forms, the snarky blonde was one of them.

They had grown up together: Lauren, the quiet little tag-along and Tamsin, the rambunctious valkyrie who was too curious for her own good. They were separated when one family had to move to some backwater planet, only to meet again when Lauren enlisted. By then, Tamsin already had two years on her due to the extra year Lauren spent studying medicine. They had rekindled the friendship, even got to sharing one of the lofty apartments on the prestigious Zakera Ward with their measly pay.

Now they were both finally a part of the N7 family, all ready to set out and start showing the galaxy what planet Earth could do.

"Oh? What are you celebrating?" the bartender asked as he poured the bright green liquid into shot glasses.

"Well, my best friend here finally managed to complete her last mission in ICT," Tamsin declared, full of pride. "And she's gonna join her best friend to save the galaxy and kick ass."

Lauren's eyes widened at the news, "Wait, what?"

Tamsin waited until the bartender had left them alone before whispering. "You aren't supposed to know until tomorrow, but I got to excited. Bennet is leaving the Trafalgar to me!"

"Oh goddess, Tam! Really? I'm so happy for you!"

"Yeah! And I want you as my Gunnery Chief!"

All Lauren could do was raise her glass and drink to the unforeseeable but extremely exciting future. The shot of Ryncol warmed her instantly, the burning could still be felt seconds after downing the alcohol. She was scared, sure, but this was an opportunity of a lifetime, damn if she did not take it. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe her sudden bravado upon learning that she had just graduated from the most grueling training the Systems Alliance offered, she was all ready to agree to it. All that was left was to actually say it.

"Tamsin, I just wan - "

Before Lauren could finish her sentence, the older blonde's lips crashed into hers, earning a loud cheer from the rest of the bar's patrons.  _Old habits die hard_ , she thought to herself as she realized she was deepening the kiss, allowing Tamsin better access. The sudden jolt to the apex of her thighs as their tongues, teeth, and lips fought for dominance.

Tamsin pulled back, her breath ragged and her green eyes twinkling. Lauren was unable to focus, only able to see the beautiful blonde in front of her.

"I take it you're saying yes to my proposition?" Tamsin smirked.

"Which one?" Lauren wriggled her eyebrows suggestively.

"Take me home and I'll show you," Tamsin's grin widened and Lauren's centre throbbed harder.

* * *

_To: Corporal Lauren Lewis  
_ _Re: N7 Training Completion_

_Dear Recruit,_

_Congratulations. It has come to our attention that your final mission in your Interplanetary Combatives Training (ICT) has been completed._

_You are hereby given N7 status. Your new armour and weapons will be delivered to your cabin. A debriefing in the main hall at 0700 hours will inform you of your post._

_Please direct any questions to Captain Jeffrey Hughs, found on the second floor of the Presidium. Attached is a map of the Citadel for your perusal._

_Once again, congratulations. Welcome to the family._


	3. Angel

**2176 CE**  ::  **Armstrong Nebula - Tereshkova - Antibaar**

"Do you even know where we're going?"

"Does it look like I can see?" a frustrated Tamsin shot back.

The cold wind howled across the arid land, so loud that even inside the environmentally-sealed M35 Mako the soldiers had to raise their voices to speak. Outside, nothing could be seen except the sheet of white constantly battering against the windscreen. While the Mako was cramped, it made up for its size in adaptability and firepower. The other drawback was the endless bumpy ride, so much so that others actually swore up and down that their bones had been shaken loose by simply being in the vehicle.

"Bloody hell! Damn Mako!" the third person of their party yelped as she bounced in her seat.

Gunnery Chief Ciara O'Breen huffed angrily as the metal hull of the vehicle groaned louder, seemingly in response to the name-calling. The British blonde had been selected alongside Lauren to receive their N7 classification, as well as hand-picked by the crew's new Lieutenant Lauren Lewis to replace her upon the SSV Trafalgar. The frigate was now Admiral Steven Hackett's go-to A-team for most missions, including this one on the frigid planet. People often joked that they were the three blonde harbingers of death and destruction, the poster girls for the Systems Alliance's wrath.

"Sorry!" Tamsin yelled back as she activated the micro-thrusters.

Lauren had been manning the mounted machine guns, but her senses were prickling. She did a cautious scan from the scope, knowing there was something dangerous about the planet, the constant howling of the wind and distinct lack of life unsettled her. Furthermore, the admiral was clear that they needed to find and destroy the geth base. It was unusual that the geth had settled outside Terminal space, but to find that they had a base here made Lauren squirm uncomfortably. Maybe it was just the pre-battle jitters she always got before a mission, especially one from the admiral.

An alarm beeped through the vehicle.  _Shit_ , Lauren cursed under her breath. She had spoken too soon.

"What's that?" Tamsin questioned from the front.

"Five - no, six - guided missiles heading our way," Ciara reported, shifting to the cannon. "Hostiles to the northwest. No heat signatures, so I guess they're the geth we're looking for."

Lauren chuckled at the old vid reference as she aimed for the Geth Colossus, holding down the trigger and feeling the gun shudder in her hands. The bullets simply glanced off the plated body, angering the monstrosity even more. It reared its photoreceptor head, all ready to fire a pulse beam at them. Ciara fired round after round through the mass accelerated cannon, cursing when she had missed the target.

"Tam, stop driving in bloody circles!" Lauren shouted over the noise.

"I'm sorry for trying to save our lives!" Tamsin barked back, swerving again to avoid the incoming missiles, earning a glare from the other two at the back of the cramped vehicle.

"Damn it! Get us closer, Tam! We're out of range!"

"I don't have a fucking death wish, Lo!"

"We'll die if we don't get out of this anyway!"

"Fine," the tall blonde grumbled, slamming down on the accelerator.

They skirted around the compound, missiles and pulse attacks hot on their tail. Tamsin expertly weaved in and out of the sharp, cyan beams falling all around them, each hit depleting the Mako's shield to a dangerous level. By the time they got back into range again, Tamsin let out a low growl as she continued dodging attacks. This could not continue for long. The geth would never get tired, hungry, or injured, neither would they run out of ammunition. The soldiers, on the other hand… They needed to do something. Lauren glanced over at Tamsin, puzzled by the sudden manic grin that appeared on the tall blonde's face.

"I know that look, babe, wha - "

"Hold on, ladies!" Tamsin roared as she sent the Mako flying off one of the nearby cliffs.

The horror in both Ciara and Lauren's eyes only seemed to make Tamsin laugh harder. They landed in the crater and were smack in the middle of the geth camp. The short moment of stunned silence was immediately bombarded by several alarms going off, notifying them of the damage that had been done to the vehicle and the hostile that surrounded them.

"Are you out of your fuc - " Lauren bellowed, reaching for her commander's collar.

Before she could finish, Tamsin cut in, "I'd suggest you get out and use those nifty marksman skills of yours before the Mako is damaged beyond repair."

Lauren narrowed her eyes at her before leaping out of the Mako. They would be having a talk about this, but later. A missile whizzed by, barely missing her lithe form as she was pulled back by Ciara. Flashing a grateful grin, she took up position behind a nearby structure as Ciara ran the opposite direction, turning on her tactical cloak and disappearing.

Reaching for her sniper rifle, Lauren pressed her eye to the scope, tracing Ciara's movements. After watching her slip out of the cloak to take down two Geth Troopers with her omni-blade and another pair with her pistols, Lauren decided that the fairy queen could take care of herself. She took aim at the snipers that sat up in their metal perches, putting holes into their metal exteriors. The kickback from the sniper's recoil always lent her comfort. But that did not last long as she watched Tamsin join the fight, charging straight for the Geth Colossus.

"Lewis, cover fire," her mentor ordered.

In that moment, Lauren was appreciative that she had Tamsin on her side. The determination glinting in those green eyes as she ran from cover to cover was more than admirable. Lauren's body subconsciously drew in a sharp breath as she realized just how enormous the Geth Colossus was. The Mako, big enough to fit three soldiers, was dwarfed by the sheer size of the machine. It was at least a 30-storey skyscraper tall, its thick limbs and plated body was the width of several cars. Tamsin almost looked comical running towards it.

"Lewis!" Tamsin yelled.

Lauren cursed her momentary daze and snapped around to provide support, switching to her disruptor ammo and taking aim at the Colossus' giant photoreceptor. This gave Tamsin time to take out two Troopers and make her way even closer to the Colossus.

"Shit," Lauren hissed as a bullet slipped past her shields, tearing her armoured sleeve open.

She found the culprit in a matter of seconds, putting a well-aimed round through its head. Her wound had stopped bleeding the moment it started, thanks to medigel. The cool and soothing gel was beginning to mend the raw flesh, adding another scar to the dozen others she had on various parts of her body.

Shifting her focus back on Tamsin, she fired off a few more rounds to keep the Colossus' attention on her. With a yelp and a leap, she managed to dodge the beam of energy hurtling towards her. Dodging the hail of bullets raining in her wake, Lauren crashed painfully into the next barrier. Her body would definitely not forgive her for that later in the day, but at least she was not part of the smoking ruins that was once her cover.

Now that Lauren had a better vantage point, she was dealing much more damage. Her finger squeezed the trigger again, and another geth fell. Ciara seemed to have destroyed most of the ground troops, giving them all a chance to pay attention to the Colossus. The two of them advanced on the machine, distracting it as much as possible as Tamsin unloaded several payloads from her customized M-920 Cain. A low whine indicated that its shields were depleted and the time for an all-out attack had arrived.

Tamsin gave a subtle nod as the rest of the team began to focus-fire at the underside of the beast. Ciara took the opportunity that Lauren still was the centre of the Colossus' ire and ran dangerously close. Lauren wanted to worry but she knew the Gunnery Chief dealt more damage up close.

"Ciara!"

Lauren was not sure if she had screamed her friend's name or if it was Tamsin. But the next moment, Ciara was hitting the side of the geth base building and Tamsin was flying through the air like a ragdoll. The Colossus suddenly stopped firing, retracting its neck and legs back into its body like a turtle. Lauren ran to the closest one, her instinct taking over as she quickly examined the damage done to the fairy queen. She was unconscious but still breathing. Dragging her to a safe place, she started looking for Tamsin.

The snow and the rising smoke made it incredibly hard to see anything, let alone find a body in the middle of the debris of burning geth parts.

"Come on, come on," Lauren urged no one in particular.

She had picked up on the soft buzzing of recharging shields. No doubt the Colossus was self-repairing and would be more in shape for a gunfight than the squad.

"Goddamn it, valkyrie! Where are you!"

The buzzing was getting louder, and Lauren felt the fear creep up her spine. She was running out of bullets, energy, and time. And more importantly, she needed to get her squadmates back onto the ship, stat. If she could find them, that is.

The buzz turned into a whine and Lauren knew that the Colossus had completed the repair and was all ready to begin its second wave of assault.

 _No_ ,  _no_ ,  _no_! Lauren thought in a panic.  _You can't be dead! You promised a life with me!_

Lauren called out a couple more times, her voice cracking with her resolve. Just as all her efforts seem futile and she was about to turn back to defend the unconscious fairy queen, a shadow zipped up across the air, leaving a trail of dust.

"What the…?"

Lauren could not believe her eyes when she looked. Tamsin! Tamsin had grown… wings? The tall blonde leapt into the air, allowing her new additions to carry her higher. She threw a confident smirk at the doctor, sending a silent message that Lauren could not yet decode. But Tamsin did not wait for a confirmation, instead she summoned a ball of blue energy in her hands, throwing a singularity at the Colossus, engulfing it in a dense, violet haze. She brought up her other hand, another sphere of energy cracking and sizzling, this time a warp field left her hand, shredding the plated armour.

"Now!" her mentor motioned for her to take fire.

 _Oh_ , Lauren realized, lifting the sniper rifle and held her breath as she aligned the crosshairs with the glowing bulb. The next moment, she was thrown back a few feet and the Colossus had disappeared, grey clouds of smoke and burning embers taking its place.

"Nice shot, Lewis," Tamsin landed beside her, her wings in the process of folding themselves away neatly.

"You have - "

"Yes, wings. Neat little things," the valkyrie smirked, patting her shoulders.

"But I couldn't fin - "

"Needed to zip back to Valhalla for a bit, sorry 'bout that."

"Y-You were - "

"Dead? Sorry to disappoint," Tamsin shrugged.

"What?"

"Odin just yelled at me for a bit and sent me back. Something about not paying attention or something. Anyway, time moves differently there, much faster. It's just a slap on th - "

"DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE DO THAT TO ME AGAIN!" Lauren roared, her hands making contact with her mentor's lapels.

For a moment, the green eyes betrayed their owner. The look of pure surprise and disbelief made Lauren's heart break. How did the beautiful blonde not realize just how important she was to Lauren? Tamsin gave her a small smile and soft lips followed the rivulet of tears Lauren did not realize were escaping her eyes.

"Fine, fine. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for interrupting you while you were speaking. I know how much you hate that," the taller blonde whispered into her ear, voice laced with mirth. "You're so dramatic."

"And you're too damn selfless."

"The reason we're not dead."

Lauren glared at the woman.

"Too soon?" came Tamsin's innocent reply before she reached over to comfort her girlfriend. "I'm alive, Lauren. It's okay, I'm right here."

"J-Just… don't do that again," the doctor repeated without cursing, before continuing in a soft mumble, "I can't stand the thought of losing you."

"You won't, I promise. I'll always be right here with you."

* * *

_To: Commander Tamsin Sigrún  
_ _Re: Debrief of Mission [21761807-ANTBR]_

_Thank you for your efforts on the planet Antibaar, the geth have been eliminated and our efforts to continue terraforming the planet will continue._

* * *

**2176 CE**  ::  **Serpent Nebula - Citadel** ::  **Zakera Ward**

"How about this?"

"No! You want to cause an explosion?" Lauren hurriedly grabbed at the small bottle of liquid.

"What?"

"Baking soda  _and_  vinegar?" Lauren gaped. "Do you remember  _nothing_  from Elder Kyrrh's chemistry class?"

Tamsin grumbled, "Sour pancakes tasted interesting in my head."

The valkyrie made a face as she absently ran her fingers over the many little plastic boxes that contained kitchen herbs. Lauren watched her closely as she adjusted the heat on their stove, placing a little butter into the round pan.

"I don't get why you insist on doing this when that damn droid could make us breakfast in bed!" Tamsin lamented, jumping up to sit on the island counter.

"Cooking is a delicate science!"

"Not again!"

Lauren continued as if she did had not heard, "By mixing the chemicals around and creating something out of nothing is worth it. And also it's oddly therapeutic. "

"Yeah, and only you could make it sound so damn geeky," Tamsin shot her a lopsided smile.

"And for that, you're getting a bunny one!"

Lauren whirled around to grab the big bowl of pancake mix. Pouring a circle carefully first, she dripped more of the thick mix into the sizzling pan, extending from the half-cooked dough to make a rabbit's ears. Tamsin quickly hopped off the counter to protest, only to earn a smack from her ladle-wielding girlfriend.

"I want a shield!"

"You mean a circle? Like a normal pancake?" Lauren teased.

The realization came to Tamsin pretty fast, and Lauren could swear the valkyrie almost looked embarrassed before muttering, "Whatever."


	4. How to Disappear Completely

_A.N.: Special thanks to **lostshadowthief**  for their infinite patience and amazing ideas. I couldn't have done it without you._

* * *

**2176 CE**  ::  **Serpent Nebula**  -  **Citadel**  ::  **Zakera**   **Ward**

Lauren walked through the bustling marketplace, armed with determination. She had to buy the gift for Tamsin today, or she would lose her nerves again. Thanks to the lack of the artificial day-night cycle, shops never closed and people never stopped. Unlike Tamsin who required a nap between meals on their off days, Zakera Ward never sleeps.

Stopping to enjoy a bowl of ramen, Lauren glanced out the tall, tinted glass, admiring the cityscape. The visual was reminiscent of old Hong Kong or Singapore, metropolises before they succumbed to the wear and tear of daily life and technology had taken upon itself to reinvent the two countries. She marveled at the wondrous product of years of peace, allowing humans and fae to come together to breathe life upon an old, dusty space station. The Council's ways may have gotten on her nerves sometimes but she knew and understood her place as a soldier in the Systems Alliance, the only fully human and fae joint venture into the forays of space.

The First Contact War between Systems Alliance and the advanced, almost ethereal species of the Citadel in 2157 occurred when she was devouring the veterinarian texts her parents required for rearing spacecows. Even at five, her parents knew Lauren was different than most children. Her intellect exceeded standards and soon outgrew their little experimental colony on the planet Demeter. They would watch Lauren choose datapads and books over other children her age. At least until Tamsin came along.

By 16, she had completed her medical training at the Citadel's foremost Huerta Memorial Hospital. Her parents had never been more proud of her as she accepted the certificate and the offer to join the Systems Alliance. Starting as a medic only solidified her abilities, soon creating and improving on methods to save many different species. And by a serendipitous turn of events, she came to train under Tamsin, picking up the friendship where they had left off. Lauren rose through the ranks and found herself being presented with the chance at joining N7, one of the youngest to ever be bestowed such an honour.

Finishing her ramen noodles and chasing the salty taste with a beer, she thanked the shop owner. The blonde wandered down the aisles, getting more narrow as she descended from the 28th level. What started as wide, sophisticated storefronts quickly became stalls and stands. Neon lights flashed for her attention, loud voices called for her acknowledgement.

She did not know why she stopped, but the tugging in her chest forced Lauren to halt in front of a small stall. The width of it no larger a meter, the sides held together by dark cloth, hundreds of chains and pendants displayed. Her eyes immediately landed on one particular one as her fingers involuntarily reached out to touch it.

"Ah, the labrys."

Lauren jumped at the voice. Her pulse settled as she turned to find an elderly woman peek out from behind the stall. Years of living had formed hard lines across the woman's forehead, and if Lauren had to guess from the way she dressed, the old woman was a colonist.

"It's very beautiful, ma'am."

The woman smiled brightly, and proceeded to hand Lauren the necklace. "A woman's strength and self-sufficiency."

Lauren examined the pendant, it looked like a double-headed axe. Her omni-tool beeped quietly, giving a brief description of the item. The Greek symbol was mainly associated with feminist movements on old Earth, declaring independence for women and was linked with female divinities. Crafted beautifully in titanium, the silver-gray pendant was not perfect, but in Lauren's eyes it was. It was perfect for the woman she loved, both the meaning behind the shape and the metal.

"I'll take it," she decided, waving her omni-tool against the scanner.

"May she love you as much as she loves it."

Lauren nodded happily, thanking the old woman. It was time to go home.

* * *

 **2177 CE**  ::  **Outskirts of Systems Alliance space - Akuze**

The ground shook as two Makos traversed the arid lands of Akuze, cracking and crumbling as though threatening to swallow the armoured vehicles whole. Akuze was barren, empty, and cruel. It was completely uninhabitable, but leave it to the idealistic fae and humans to want to terraform every planet they came across.

"What the hell does the admiral even expect to find in this shithole?"

"Scared, Lutz?" Tamsin taunted. "Just follow orders, ogre."

Private Daniel Lutz grumbled on the other end of the communicator and Tamsin proceeded to ignore him.

"He's right though," Lauren began.

They had driven across the planet for what seemed to be hours, only to survey the cracked, red soil. The scanners had picked nothing up for the past thirty minutes, and to be honest, Lauren was beginning to get antsy. Admiral Hackett had been clear on what they were to do: find out what happened to the colony they had established earlier in the year.

"Et tu, Brute?" Tamsin huffed.

"I mean, it's not like - "

"A whole colony went missing! Someone has to look for these missing fae and humans."

Lauren kept quiet. Even though she knew that the admiral would not place them in danger purposely, the entire mission was full of holes from the start. The communicators at the colony had pinged them back, so that meant that the comm buoy was in working order, just that no one was responding. Also the initial scan of the planet showed no humans or fae in the supposed area, resulting in the more manual option of sending teams to investigate. This was getting more curious by the minute.

The vehicle suddenly lurched and Lauren slammed into the armoured panel, cursing loudly as the impact jarred her entire body, rousing her from her thoughts. Tamsin and Corporal Bernard Lee had not fared any better if their shocked faces were any proof, albeit for two different reasons.

"What the fuck, Corporal?" Tamsin snapped at the cowering man.

"S-Sorry, ma'am," he stuttered, his eyes darting wildly across the monitors. "There was - I think there was movement."

"You  _think_?"

"Something moved behind the shack on the right," he pointed, tracing his fingers across the screen. He added in a small voice, "Should we check it out?"

Tamsin only nodded while the shaken corporal notified the other team. Lauren studied the map, realizing they had surveyed half the planet already and were finally at the colony they were tasked to scout. She pressed a button on her new Karpov pistol, turning off the safety. With the sleek gunmetal weapon in her hand, she hopped off the Mako after Tamsin, who cradled an Avenger assault rifle.

"Listen up," the valkyrie spoke to her gathered troops. "Since there hasn't been anything moving on the surface, this may well be a wasted trip but we have to check it out, as per orders. Stay in formation and call out when you find something."

The soldiers muttered their assent as they begin moving toward the colony. The living shacks were mostly intact, except for the few that were in shambles at the far end of the area. The two teams advanced in silence, all of them trained in the art of stealth, ready to act upon a moment's notice.

Lauren trod along the dusty roads carefully, still unsure of what they were dealing with. When she found a console, she immediately hacked it, eager to find out what happened on Akuze. A series of logs appeared in front of her and she picked the first one.

 _We heard noises again last night_ , the dated entry read,  _at first we thought it was the cows but Trey couldn't find anything. I told him we need to tell Elder Henris but he said that it was okay. Anyway, today I saw Jason kissing Carlos! It's so nice to see love blossoming so far away from Earth._

The second and third entry described more noises happening and the fourth was a rather explicit piece of erotica that left Lauren blushing. The dates on the logs began to get irregular, still noting the presence of weird noises and gossip until the eleventh and final one.

 _Something is seriously wrong here,_ the screen showed,  _Mitch and Phoebe have been missing for almost three weeks. The elder has said nothing so far but I know something is going on! Shit, I just heard a yell, maybe Trey fell or something. I'll co_

That was the last entry. A chill ran down her spine as Lauren finished reading it, the unfinished word unsettled her. As though compelled to check behind that particular shack for clues, she rounded the corner, preparing for the worst. But there was nothing. Standing in the middle of the now-defunct perimetre set up for space cows, she wondered what tore such a large hole in the fence.

"There's something here!" came the voice of a private, whose name Lauren had forgotten.

They gathered at the broken shack that had caught Lauren's attention first. One of the side panels of the rectangular living cabin was completely gone, causing the heavy roof to crumple beneath its weight to one side. Lauren was the first to notice the torn limb still clutching the rail of a stairway, below it was the colour of red rust. Dried blood.

"What the fuck!" Corporal Lutz swore as soon as he followed Lauren's eyes, paling at the sight.

Tamsin furrowed her eyebrows, no doubt eliminating ideas of how the arm ended up there. Another private with a forgettable name retched in a corner. Lauren felt sorry for the man but this was how warzones looked like and worse. She turned her gaze away from the man and back to the severed limb.

"It looks like an animal attack," Lauren concluded from the way the flesh was torn, jagged and painful.

"What could have done this?"

"A space cow?" suggested an unhelpful soldier.

Tamsin shot the soldier a death glare, making her retreat to care for the soldier who was still bent over. She ordered the mouthy Private Lutz to collect the arm for processing. Lauren wanted to take another look at it but that could wait till later.

"Maybe it has something to do with the - "

A low rumble in the distance caught her attention as she whipped her head towards the sound. The land stayed motionless, the sky was free of everything. That left only one option.

"Everyone get to higher ground!" Lauren yelled, scrambling up a stretch of broken stairs.

Tamsin joined her up on the roof of a shack as she ordered her team to stay low when they had reached an elevated position. The rest of the squad followed orders and clambered to other various parts above ground level. Lauren heard the noise again and knew she would not be able to see anything.

Instead she spoke to Tamsin, "The colonists found something here," she paused, looking around at the devastation, "Or something found them, I'm not sure. But they heard noises, and people were disappearing."

The noise was now closer, close enough for Lauren to see the parched ground crack a little and the pebbles on the surface jump to life. Tamsin shot her a confused look.

"What are you doing, LT?" Tamsin whispered in alarm as Lauren grabbed a damaged pipe.

"Just testing a theory," Lauren calmly replied, throwing the object.

The pipe clattered loudly as it hit the dirt, all the soldiers ceased to move and watched with bated breath. The rumbling from the ground had stopped but for a moment. As though with renewed energy, the terrible noise grew louder as it charged towards the pipe with a vengeance.

When the soldiers present recounted the tale in the future, it would be embellished with great exaggeration in favour of their bravery and strategy. But what really happened was that everyone froze in a seemingly reverent silence as the creature broke the surface under the pipe, rose 10 feet above ground and pierced the stunned silence with a deafening, ghastly shriek.

"Fucking worm!" Tamsin recovered first and growled as she took aim.

That was what kicked their survival instinct back into action and their training took over. Two of the shotgun-wielding privates lobbed grenades at the giant worm, easily as thick as the width of a building. Being an L2 biotic, Corporal Lee harnessed the dark energy while the rest emptied clip after clip into the monstrosity.

The worm writhed in discomfort as the soldiers attacked, screeching bloody death. It thrashed about, making the already unstable structures even more wobbly. Lauren watched, wide-eyed, as the creature leapt into the air and brought its hundred-tonne body down onto two of her squadmates, immediately swallowing one of them whole and Private Lutz had been sawn in half by the razor sharp teeth. His torn body twitched in the hot sun, painting the dry land with the bright contrast of fresh blood. With his last breath, he reached out to where Lauren and Tamsin stood, as though asking them for help. The older blonde squeezed her eyes shut, looking away from her fallen soldier.

The long body disappeared into the arid land as fast as it appeared, leaving them all confused and distraught for a while. The soldiers attacked the beast with a newfound rage, fueled by the loss of their teammates.

"Die, motherfucker!"

"Kill that piece of shit!"

Lauren was too busy to take note of who had yelled what but she noticed that the hide of the beast was too thick, bullets simply glanced off its natural armour.  _There has to be a better way_ , she thought, thinking back to the lessons during her training.

The Thresher Maw was said to be a descendent of the great serpent Jörmungandr. They were blind but their sense of hearing had evolved to aid them in hunting. They had a voracious appetite, one that could devour battalions in a matter of seconds. Many had encountered the brute as explorations into space were increased but most of them did not return.

Lifting her pistol, she aimed carefully and fired several rounds into the fleshy flaps of the worm's mouth. It whipped its head about as a loud groan rose from the depths of its body. Purple liquid spluttered out of the wounds as the rest of her squad followed her lead, aiming for the mouth.

But this victorious discovery was short lived as the worm dove below ground again.

"Anyone has eyes on that fucking thing?" Tamsin barked into the communications device.

As if it sensed their confusion, it took the chance to take out the partially destroyed shack Corporal Lee stood on, sending him sliding off the smooth panels to the ground. The rest of the building crumbled quickly, causing the adjacent one to collapse. The worm leapt and went straight for the corporal but only managed to knock him backwards. It resurfaced only to slam its weight upon the other unsuspecting soldier.

The corporal quickly scrambled to his feet in a panic as he tried to climb back up onto something stable. Tamsin was cheering the man on, yelling for him to hurry up. Lauren kept a watchful eye out but before she could react, the structure beneath her feet began to shake violently, throwing her to the edge.

Tamsin reacted quickly, diving with her hands stretched to pull the woman back. As they struggled to their feet, a scream sent them turning their heads towards the corporal. They watched in horror as Lee, clung tightly to a pole, his dangling legs were in the vice-like grip of the maw's cutting teeth. He screamed in agony as it attempted to pull him below ground.

"No! Stop!" Lauren shouted but it was too late.

The valkyrie leapt into action, spreading her dark wings and charged towards the beast as her assault rifle roared to life. Her aim was true, striking the Thresher Maw where it hurt the most but as fast as fae reactions could be, this predator was bred to decimate entire platoons. It let go of the corporal's legs to release a long spray of burning acid at his new prey. Lauren could only observe helplessly as Tamsin pulled off her armour, hissing in pain but with a look of pure fury in her eyes.

"That cost me a year's pay, fucker!" Tamsin snarled as she released another clip into the hulking monster.

Lauren tried to distract the Thresher Maw using her pistol, firing off several rounds, careful not to be hitting her squadmates. Tamsin being louder and nearer took the brunt of the beast's anger as it did another dive, narrowly missing her. As her finger squeezed the trigger, Lauren realized there was a chance they would not get out of this alive. Her brain worked faster: the only way to destroy the oversized worm was to first get rid of its tough hide. Bullets were not penetrating but perhaps a well-aimed grenade could help.

Drawing the beast back towards her, Lauren ran across the rooftops, making as much noise as she could. She only hoped that the beast would follow her deeper into the dilapidated colony. She hammered on the metal roof with her sidearm, her heart rate increasing as the ground near her cracked and exposed the slithering body.

Using her previous trick, she threw a broken piece of what was once part of a shack onto the ground below, steadying herself knowing that she only had one chance. Like clockwork, the great beast broke from the ground, rearing its head and gnashing its terrible teeth. Lauren trained her sight onto its jaws, thick saliva and acid dripping from the sides, and released the grenade from her hands.

She was not religious, but watching that grenade fly through the air, Lauren prayed. Oh, how she prayed for the literal ticking time bomb to land where she had intended. The world around them stilled, all eyes followed the trajectory of the object no bigger than a fist.

And it landed. Right inside the Thresher Maw's mouth.

It was almost comical, the way it descended and the way the worm rose up to meet it. A breath later, a deafening explosion shook the ground as sizeable chunks of purple and grey viscera splattered the area surrounding. The body was separated from the head, a rather poetic reflection of justice served, and the decapitated piece landed with a dull thud near Tamsin.

Lauren finally allowed herself to look. She groaned as she stood, her gorgeous armour was covered in goo and bits. She called the Trafalgar and requested for a MEDEVAC and jumped off the ledge, hurrying towards the rest of her team.

In the short while that had taken place, Corporal Lee was no longer moving due to the severe blood loss from the deep lacerations on his thigh. If Lauren had to guess, one of the worm's bites got lucky and severed the poor man's femoral artery, causing him to bleed out faster than necessary. Tamsin on the other hand was bruised and battered but she looked like she fared better. But the thought crossed her mind too soon as the valkyrie coughed, sputtering blood.

She fought hard against her impending exhaustion. The world swirled around her when she finally caught sight of the tiny hissing hole in her armor.  _Looks like the damn worm won after all_ , Lauren thought bitterly as she fell to her knees.

She saw Tamsin's worried face but could only crawl to her as the colours blurred and smeared together into a grotesque rainbow. While one hand was held out to the valkyrie, the other was grasping haphazardly at the utility kit strapped on her chest. She needed to hurry, the toxin from the Thresher Maw's acid had paralyzing qualities, aiding in hunting.

Pulling out an ampule, she plunged the attached needle into her neck, feeling the cool liquid swim into her bloodstream. She reached across her chest to yank a second one out and stabbed Tamsin with it. She could apologise for that later, for now, she was going to save her life.

Tamsin gave a low groan and Lauren replied with a similar tone. Both were losing their ability to speak as the magic of the anti-venom worked its way through their bodies to rid them of the poison cruising through their veins.

With the last bout of strength, she called the Trafalgar again and she closed her eyes, her eyelids were becoming too heavy. She only hoped that someone would come save them soon.

* * *

_To: Staff Lieutenant Lauren Lewis_   
_RE: Incident Report [21770126-AKZ]_

_I regret to inform you that Lieutenant Commander Tamsin Sigrún could not be recovered. A memorial will be held in her name at 0900 hours on the Commons._

_As her listed contact, you will have to accept her Purple Heart posthumously awarded for her heroism and her sacrifice._

_I'm sorry for your loss. The Alliance will always remember the brave soldier for her fearlessness._

_Deepest Condolences,_   
_Admiral Hackett_


	5. Human Contact

**2184 CE**  ::  **Serpent Nebula** -  **Citadel** ::  **Presidium** -  **Systems Alliance Office**

The woman behind the counter could not be more than twenty. She tapped idly into the console in front of her, occasionally mumbling into the minute microphone attached to her half-visor. Sometimes she would get up and shuffle some papers on her desk around. Other times, she would just sit and sip her from her mug, her eyes casually reading the screen.

Lauren knew all this because she had been sitting in the same room, patiently waiting for her turn. Ever since the incident on Akuze, Lauren had been a recluse. She had withdrawn into her shell and volunteered for missions in the fringes of Terminal space, one that was not controlled by the Systems Alliance. Many have said that the blonde doctor risked her life because she did not feel like she deserved her second chance. Not after what happened with her previous commander. She had ship-hopped, not of her own will but mainly because the respective commanders were loath to have a soldier like her aboard.

She was a force to be reckoned with on the battlefields, fighting with reckless abandon, jumping in front of fire to rescue her squadmates, refusing to obey direct commands. Her skills had only gotten sharper since Akuze, the incident earning her a reputation of her fearlessness. They had commended her for her ability to survive, and Tamsin's bravery and leadership, both medals she begrudgingly accepted.

Now she sat in the room with two other soldiers, waiting on her new posting. She applied to be on board the Normandy SR-2, the most famous ship in the Systems Alliance fleet. Or infamous, depending on the situation. She and her crew were credited with saving the High Council and the flagship dreadnought of the Citadel Fleet. Which had caused the demise of the original Normandy, the SR-1, and prompted the building of the Normandy SR-2. But they were also known for skirting the rules when the need arose, when saving a life meant disobeying orders.

Lauren knew the Normandy's commander was a Spectre, a Council appointed agent given almost free reign and reported to no one but the Council. She also knew that the ship herself was a technological marvel, with a Tantalus Drive Core that put the older models to shame and a stealth system that made it an excellent scouting ship. Other than that, she had no clue about the rest of the crew. Not that she cared anyway, she was there to serve.

"Staff Lieutenant Lewis?"

Lauren was snapped back from her thoughts. She looked up to find that she had gained entry to the room beyond. Nodding her thanks, she picked up her beret and smoothed her dress blues as she walked to the door. Three soft knocks later, she entered the office. It was simply furnished, just several shelves, a desk, and a man sitting behind an active console. The red, angry flesh of old scars looked just at home with the scowl he wore, not one of annoyance but of years spent hardened by battle. The whitening beard that outlined his pursed lips only accented his age but his eyes shone with intelligence and an energy that she had only seen in younger men.

"Sir," Lauren saluted.

"Have a seat, Lieutenant," Admiral Hackett nodded.

Lauren sat stiffly, her hands placed neatly over her beret in front of her. She studied the man closely, remembering the words he had sent her after the incident on Akuze. His piercing blue eyes seemed to do the same, trying to gauge a reaction. She did not know how long they had stared at each other, but she was content just staring at the man who had presented her with her medals.

"I understand that you want another transfer," he broke the silence. "to the Normandy?"

"Yes, sir."

"Is your time on the Budapest unfulfilling?"

"No, sir."

She hated this part. They always waited for her to elaborate. It was not as if her time on the SSV Budapest was a waste of time, but she was butting heads with the commander on a daily basis. The weak-willed woman was not fit to be commander and simply did not understand that every life was sacred. That alone had sparked more than one argument, not to mention the difference in their methods.

"It was more than fulfilling, sir," she gave in. "But I'm expanding my horizons. Greener pastures."

She could swear the admiral looked amused at her explanation.

"I see," was his non-committal response.

The silence enveloped them again. As she stared at him, she could not help but think of… Tamsin. They were his A-team, his go-to whenever problems arose. And she knew he was not a heartless bastard but she did not see any efforts made to recover her dead girlfriend's body. Her face twitched in anger as she fought to reign in control.

"Is there something wrong, Lieutenant?"

 _Shit, he caught it_.

"No, sir. Just wondering if you've approved my application to join the Normandy."

"Your application has been approved. Your records are excellent Lieutenant, just watch that attitude. I don't want to have to review another transfer. Now is there anything else?"

Lauren's eyes widened, slightly surprised that she was so easy to read. No, she decided that she was not going to ask now. Some part of her still held out that Tamsin had simply disappeared, and that joining the Normandy could give her a higher chance.  _That is_ , she thought with a shuddering breath,  _if Tamsin's still alive_.

But right now, there was no point, so Lauren stood to leave. She gave a salute and Admiral Hackett stood to return it.

"No, sir. Thank you, sir."

"Before you leave, Lo," she flinched at the intimate nickname. "We tried to find her, but there was really nothing on Akuze except you. I'm sorry, we all are."

Lauren closed her eyes and swallowed thickly, she could feel the tears threatening to escape. She wanted to turn and yell at the man for not trying hard enough, for sending backup too late, for sending them there at all. No amount of compensation or therapy would have brought Tamsin back, and this man, whom she had once loved and respected, thought that a simple apology could take that all away? Ridiculous.

Taking in a deep breath, she nodded and walked out the door. She did not have to put up with this, especially not today.

* * *

 **2184 CE**  ::  **Serpent Nebula**  -  **Citadel**  ::  **Presidium Commons**

The tall, dark marble wall erected outside the embassies usually went unnoticed by Lauren, numb to its presence. Maybe it was talking with the admiral, maybe it was today, but she did not anticipate the staggering emotions as she walked past it.

The Systems Alliance seal proudly emblazoned in the middle, hundreds of thinner bars in the same lighter shade of silver flanked both sides. Smooth gold letters carved upon slate grey stone on each of them. Each was a name. Each was someone's child. Each was a warrior. Each was a soldier.

Lauren bowed her head, sending a silent prayer for their sacrifice. Her eyes darted to a particular one, one that her eyes have always trained upon whenever she came by to pay her respects.

_Lieutenant-Commander Tamsin Sigrún_

No explanation was needed for her sacrifice. None of them needed one. From the front pocket of her dress blues, she fished out the pendant she had bought almost a decade ago. Her fingers traced the delicate pattern as she recalled the brilliant grin, the cautious vulnerability , the witty snark.

"Tamsin," she breathed out, tears sliding down her cheek.

 _I miss you_ , Lauren cried silently, repeating the same words every year.  _I miss you so much. I'm so sorry._

* * *

 **2184 CE**  ::  **Serpent Nebula** -  **Citadel**  ::  **Darkstar Bar**

The burn of the Ryncol soothed Lauren, heating up her cold, empty heart. She chuckled internally at her flair for the dramatic. Picking up another shot, she threw it back, enjoying the slow burn and the bitter aftertaste.

She was determined to get as drunk as possible tonight, though her cybernetic reconstruction was making it increasingly difficult. The toxin from the Thresher Maw had done more damage internally, despite the minute amount that entered her bloodstream. Human blood was exceptionally weak to the older, more ghastly types of underfae, especially the big bad ones that could swallow a humanoid whole. The surgery had replaced most of her insides with cybernetic-enhanced hardware. In layman's terms, she was only 21.24% human.

And today of all days, she had to get the news of the transfer. She could not even be happy even if she wanted to. The days and months after Tamsin's death had been hard on her, even though it was less difficult now. But the anniversary of her death was a particularly tough day to get through. It was the day she failed as a doctor and a girlfriend, and to only be reminded of it yearly was pure torture.

She threw back another shot of the obscenely green liquid, letting the burn eat at her as punishment. But she knew no punishment was enough when she was the only one that survived the horror that was Akuze.

"Hey beautiful, can I get you a drink?"

Lauren turned to stare at an obviously drunk man who had invaded her personal space. She looked around her to make sure he was speaking to her, before turning to face him with a frown.

"Sorry."

"I asked if you wanted a drink," he grinned, wriggling his eyebrows.

"Yeah, and I said 'sorry', because no, I don't want a drink."

"Come on, baby! Don't be like that!" the man moved even closer. "I can show you a good time."

She glared at the man, completely incredulous. She would have forgiven his advances since he was drunk, but today she really was not in the mood. In an instant, she thought of fifteen ways to incapacitate him but a report from Citadel Security, better known as C-Sec, would be another ugly taint on her otherwise already-spotty records.

"I think the lady already said no, so why don't you scoot a little further away."

"Fuck you, bitch, I saw her first."

Swivelling the bar stool around, Lauren caught sight of a beautiful brunette. Her hair fell past her shoulders, framing the delicate features on her face. But Lauren knew in an instant that she was a marine as well, aside from the obvious N7 logo on her black leather jacket. She was not tall but her stature did not affect the intimidating stance she held with her head held high, her lips curved in disgust. Hardened, dark brown eyes narrowed at the intoxicated man, daring him to issue a challenge.

"Back off, buddy."

The man decided he was pushed around enough for a night and lunged at the brunette. She side-stepped him easily, letting him fall drunkenly to the ground. But he was a soldier too, perhaps from C-Sec. He jumped back up at the newcomer as she turned to speak to Lauren but the blonde saw him. Her fist extended and retracted so quickly that the brunette hardly had time to be surprised before she heard a dull thud behind her.

"Nice jab," the brunette chuckled, a little surprised.

"He was coming at you," Lauren shrugged. "And the angle was perfect for a knockout. It wasn't hard to calculate how far my arm needed to extend to avoid your face."

The brunette shot her a look that said she was impressed and confused at the same time.

"Thanks," Lauren held out her hand.

"Glad I was able to save a beautiful woman," the brunette's grip was firm as she chuckled.

"Glad I could say the same."

Lauren blanched. What had made her say that?

The brunette continued to laugh softly, "Thank you though, that douchebag would've landed a hit and that would've hurt."

The thumping of the bass encompassed them as they both took turns to stare at each other. Lauren could not decide whether the alcohol was finally kicking in, or that this was a natural impulse for her body to crave, since she was in the stages of grief. At any other time, the chivalry would have been adorable and Lauren would have asked for the woman's details. But tonight, no. Not tonight.

Thankfully, she did not have to.

"I'm Bo," she smiled, her dimples caused an erratic increase in Lauren's heart rate. "Would it be crass of me to ask to buy you a drink? You know, for saving my head from a bad bruise?"

"Only if you let me buy you one too," Lauren relented, waving the bartender over. "Ryncol okay? Nothing else really works for me."

"Strong stuff, but sure," Bo took the seat next to her. "And also, Tommy," she turned to the bartender and pointed behind her, "send an escort for Private Asshole here would you? He's killing the vibe."

The bartender returned with their drinks, a soda with a dash of the acid green liquor. They sipped their drinks, laughing about the cluelessness of men. While it was not his fault he assumed Lauren was straight, the way he imposed himself on her seemed to have made Bo's innate need for justice roar for action.

"If I knew you had such a strong right hook, I wouldn't have bothered," Bo teased.

Lauren blushed, grinning wildly, "Well, if I knew there was going to be someone like you coming to my rescue…"

The brunette's laugh made Lauren shiver in delight. It had been a while since anyone made her feel like that, so oddly free and fun. The endorphin release from flirting and the dopamine rush was almost comparable to actual intoxication. Conversation flowed between the two women, easy and fluid, from one topic to the next. Lauren was thoroughly enjoying herself.

The realization hit her and she sobered up fast. The attraction was instant and overwhelming. Not to mention how funny and intelligent Bo was. No, not tonight. She had already given herself prior warning and was slightly peeved that her usual self-discipline did nothing to stop her actions.

"Hey, is something wrong?" Bo's hand closed the distance and laid gently on her arm.

"Hmm? Sorry, what?" Lauren feigned ignorance.

"Your face, you kinda scrunched it up like you smelled something bad. Did I say something?" Her thumb began to rub soothing circles against Lauren's forearm.

 _No_ , Lauren wanted to say. No, because Bo had been the perfect companion on her darkest night of the year. No, because it was Lauren's fault. No, because she slipped up and needed a distraction.

And what a beautiful distraction this woman was.

There. She finally admitted it to herself. The burden of her guilt has weighed heavily on her for the past five years, despite knowing, somewhere in her mind, that she was not the cause of the horrors that happened on Akuze. She knew - understood - scientifically that she had to be long past the stages of her grief. Yet she felt like she was still in the denial phase, her actions were proof. Any mission that had to do with the Dark, she volunteered, hoping to catch a glance of blonde hair she spent hours nuzzling in, the shade of blonde belonging to the woman she still believed existed. And in every mission, she completes them as recklessly as possible, completely disregarding her life. She knew this. So what was this?

 _Punishment_ , Lauren knew in an instant. Punishment for a terrible accident she did nothing to stop. Punishment for the most beautiful times of her life lost forever. Punishment for being alive.

Bo squeezed her forearm and Lauren snapped back to the present, eyebrows raised in question. The blonde could only lift her glass and in one swift motion, she drained its contents. Honey brown eyes met dark chocolate ones with a flicker of interest and a sudden intensity.

"Let's go somewhere more private," Lauren husked as she lead the brunette away from the noisy bar.


	6. Guilty Pleasure

**2184 CE**  ::  **Eagle Nebula** -  **Citadel**  ::  **Bachjret Ward**

Breathless. Panting. Sweaty. Entangled. Epic.

These were the words that finally registered in the blonde's mind when a satisfied hum tickled her throat as she rubbed sleep from her eyes. The body beside her was warm, deep breaths drawn evenly. An arm that was not hers draped lazily over her toned abdomen, her own arm pinned under the soft form. She cautiously pulled back her arm to push the strands of gold from her face.

Lauren gasped quietly as she saw the wavy dark hair fanned out across her pillows and the memories of last night flooded her mind. They had made their way back to her apartment, both a hot mess from all the touching in the skycar. The woman was beautiful, stretched out like a cat, satisfied and purring. Her skin held remnants of their tryst, damp yet cool. In fact, the whole room held remnants of what transpired last night as she glanced around to assess the damage: clothes strewn everywhere, her dress blues laid crumpled near the foot of the bed; furniture askew and in disarray, her dining chairs toppled over and several articles of clothing hung from the low fluorescent tube; her body was sore, not necessarily tight aches but a deep throbbing that reminded her of how deliciously she moaned last night.

 _What if she wants breakfast?_  Lauren eyes were now wide as saucers.

Terrified of waking the woman, Lauren slipped out of bed quietly. Lauren cursed her inability to remain as neat and meticulous when she was drunk as she was sober when she tried to skip over the obstacle course of clothing. Quickly throwing on a t-shirt and jeans, she grabbed her jacket and proceeded to leave a note on Bo's omni-tool.

_Thanks for last night. Sorry, had to run. Feel free to use the bathroom and grab anything you'd like from the fridge._

Before she chickened out, Lauren hit the send button. Still not breathing, she walked out of her apartment and into the elevator. She hummed nervously with the pleasant music, taking in a much needed breath of air when she stepped out of the building.

"Oh god," Lauren whispered to no one in particular.

The ward was still cloaked in artificial darkness, she had left her apartment in the middle of a night cycle. Small street lamps added to the ambience, dim and unintrusive. Save for a few nearby hovercars in the distance, the silence served to jar her senses. One of the reasons why she and Tamsin chose this place: the insufferable din from the Commons and the market was drowned out here by the sound-dampeners. And it held old Earth's rustic quaintness, with lamp posts and wooden doors.

Tamsin.

What had she done! Five years of her searching for Tamsin. Five years of her keeping her unspoken vows to a presumably dead girlfriend. Five years of pent-up frustrations. Yet one night of supposed over-inebriation, she wound up in bed with a gorgeous brunette and then chose to freeze outside the confines of her warm bed after the deed.

Lauren slumped against the nearby wall, feeling the cold from the metal seep into her bones. Her arms hugged her knees as she struggled to breathe. She gave up on berating herself, chanting in her mind that she needed this, she deserved this. But there was no difference. Just as there had been no difference between last night and the many nights before, yet she chose so poorly, like a horny teenager. The desolate gnawing in her chest was slowly numbing her.

 _Tamsin would understand_ , part of her rationalized.  _Tamsin would have wanted you to move on_.

"But not like this," Lauren countered aloud.

She felt like she had dishonoured her girlfriend. Her body may have been ready to move on but her mind was not. How could she, when she was wrapped up so warmly in the memories of the blonde valkyrie? When every instance of intimacy only served to remind her more of Tamsin? Even the mere thought of breakfast sent her mind reeling back to their morning adventures.

Then Lauren realized it. It was not that she could not move on, move past these memories. She did not want to. She did not want to feel as if no one was trying hard to keep Tamsin's heroic deed alive, or remember her until the next soldier comes along. She did not want that and Tamsin had deserved better than that.

* * *

 **2184 CE**  ::  **Serpent Nebula**  -  **Citadel**  ::  **D27 Docks**

With her duffel bag slung over her shoulder, Lauren marched towards Docking Bay B, where she was told the Normandy SR-2 would be. Despite her almost pristine appearance, she was fidgeting. She nervously straightened her dress blues and fixed the angle of her beret. She tied her hair several times, finally just left her blonde locks to fall naturally around her shoulders. She rested against the railing overlooking one of the many ports on the Citadel, her eyes ignoring the movements of the ships docking and leaving.

Around her were other soldiers, several families and probably one or two journalists. The familiar pangs of sudden loneliness clawed at her heart. A sobbing man nearby clung onto what Lauren presumed was his husband, each whispering their dread at being separated. A young to her left questioning her mother why daddy had to leave them alone.

This discomfort was something she felt before, but never this intensely in a long while. She blamed the human - or fae, she thought wryly - connection from last night, fueling her current state. Her emotional senses were more acute, as though the floodgates had been opened and the barrage of emotions have been released. Her scientific mind wanted to analyze everything, wanted to understand how the physicality of last night's act led to the liberation of her feelings.

"Lieutenant Lewis?"

Lauren looked up into brown eyes. The dark blonde man that greeted her was tall, his face covered by a scraggly beard. While serious, there was a slight smile as he extended his hand. From the number of stripes, she knew that this man had risen quite far up the ranks, though by no means was he the commander of the ship.

"First Lieutenant Dyson Thornwood," he introduced himself as Lauren shook his hand.

Lauren nodded, "Good to meet you, Lieutenant."

"Please, call me Dyson. It's an honour to have you aboard the Normandy, Dr. Lewis," the man led her towards the appropriate docking bay.

"The honour is mine, Lieu - Dyson. The Normandy and her crew are renowned in all corners of the galaxy, I look forward to great adventures."

Upon reaching the airlock, the dock's doors opened and closed with a pneumatic hiss. Their conversation was shallow as orange lights covered them. The ship made a quick analysis of their contamination levels before clearing them to board the Normandy SR-2.

In terms of different frigates and ships in general, Lauren was quite well-travelled. But knowing is different from seeing. A soft gasp still escaped her as the secondary set of doors opened. The sleek interior of metal was muted by the lack of light but still showcased the technology used. Stepping out from the airlock, the bustling, emotion-filled docks area was definitely different to the sombre, serious tone of the Normandy.

"That's the cockpit and that's our pilot, Hale Santiago," Dyson pointed to their left.

A dark-skinned man turned from his seat and waved, "Heard we're getting a newbie today, welcome aboard!"

Just that like that, the solemn tone dissipated. Lauren smiled, nodding as she followed Dyson deeper into the depths of the ship. He gave her a brief rundown of the Command Deck, where most of the action took place. The Combat Information Centre, better known as the CIC, was impressive. The long, oval panels of buttons and flashing lights required several crewmen to man it at once, it was the most new-tech piece of equipment Lauren had ever seen. The holographic galaxy map flashed in the middle, indicating where the Normandy had docked and a short description of the Citadel. In between the elevator, sectioned near the back of the CIC, and the cutting-edge technology stood a bubbly Yeoman Kelly Chambers, animatedly explaining her duties of keeping the commander's emails and schedules in check.

Behind the elevator was a laboratory as well as an armory, both of which were Lauren's territory. They had hired her to be a infiltration specialist as well as the vessel's Gunnery Chief. Though a couple a ranks below her actual one, she took it willingly. Lauren needed this. The laboratory was simple and housed enough equipment and space for her to do decent experiments and testing, if the need arose. The armoury was equal in size, a row of lockers to the side while an assortment of gadgets lay on the workbench. There was also a mattress at the far end and that, Dyson told her, would be where she bunkered down for the nights.

The tour continued, the party of two taking the elevator to the depths of the Normandy. Reaching the fourth deck, Dyson explained that the stern of the ship was where the heart of Normandy was kept - the Drive Core, a vastly improved model from the original Tantalus Core where stealth systems have been boosted. If given more time, Lauren would have wanted to enjoy what a marvel it was, allowing a temporary mass effect field to envelop the entire vessel to keep it hidden from enemies' eyes. The bow of the ship housed the training area complete with mats and a small gym with some basic equipment.

The third deck was the crew's quarters, where most of the crew spent their time. The mess hall was headed by Mess Sergeant Fitzpatrick "Trick" McCorrigan, an old veteran who was actually more of a jack-of-all-trades, including plumbing and bartending. He owned one of the most popular pubs on the Citadel - The Dál Riata. Major Dr. Karin Chakwas was the ship's resident medical officer and communications liaison, residing mostly in the medical bay. And on the same level Dyson, as the Normandy's Executive Officer, has an office opposite the medical bay.

"What about the top floor?" Lauren inquired as she was being ushered into the communications room.

"That's the commander's quarters, she'll be down to greet you in a second."

"She?" Lauren was suitably impressed.

"Yes, she," a voice behind her replied.

 _Such a familiar voice_ , the blonde thought but for some odd reason, could not bring herself to turn to face the newcomer.

"Commander," Dyson greeted.

"Thank you Dyson, leave us."

As the man left, Lauren turned around and froze. Every cell in her body literally froze upon looking at her new commanding officer.

"Bo?" Lauren whispered, incredulous.

"You must be…" she looked to the dossier in her hand, "Lauren Lewis," her dark brown eyes became momentarily steely as she extended her hand. "I'm Commander Bo Dennis of the SSV Normandy SR-2."

 _The_  Bo Dennis? Lauren almost fainted. She was not one to fangirl over celebrities but Bo Dennis was a household name. Everyone was familiar with her rise to stardom in the Systems Alliance, escaping the clutches of a life surrounded by petty theft and gang members. Everyone knew how she managed to stop the corrupt fellow Spectre agent Aife from devastating the entire Citadel and her previous Council. Everyone was aware of the legend of her heroic past where she almost singlehandedly held off the slavers on Elysium until reinforcements arrived. Moreover, Bo's reputation of being the only unaligned fae in history was absolute.

Lauren gingerly returned the handshake, still reeling from having seen this woman - her CO, the Citadel's sweetheart - moaning and writhing in her bed. She simply could not reconcile the images - intimate and official. She had to admit that Bo looked incredibly smart in her dress blues, with her hair tied neatly into a ponytail below her peaked cap. There was a smirk playing on her lips, and Lauren could guess why. When had she become so transparent?

And what  _luck_. Of all the women on all the ships, Lauren had to pick the one she slept with the night before from a relatively quiet club.  _Maybe that's my thing_ , she mused inwardly, though not at all seeing the humour in the situation.  _Power and authority_.

"I understand you were from the Budapest?" Bo took a seat and continued browsing the dossier.

"Yes," Lauren answered too quickly. "Yes, ma'am."

Bo shot her a look, dark eyes momentarily flashed blue.

"Succubus?" Lauren blurted but did not flinch, feeling like she somehow should have paid more attention to media reports.

Bo seemed impressed and nodded, still scrolling through the datapad.

Lauren took this silence to reflect. The woman practically dripped sex last night, even the simple hoodie and jeans had done nothing to mute her sultriness. And from her abilities in bed… Lauren should have guessed. As much as she was unable to remember much last night, her body did not forget - not the aching thighs and calves, that felt like she had tensed up so much because of the sheer number of orgasms that possibly rippled through her; not the reddish-purple bruise just below her collarbone, that sent a fresh wave of arousal pulsing through her whenever her fingers ran over it; not the hoarseness in her throat, that made her voice a little more raspy and enticing.

Bo cleared her throat and Lauren snapped to look at her in embarrassment.

_Why does she look like she knows?_

"I  _am_ a succubus," Bo stated, slightly amused, as though it explained everything.

Their eyes met.

In hindsight, Lauren would say that this was the cheesiest thing that ever happened but her breath was literally caught in her chest. She had not dared to make a noise, lest it came out as a garble. But Bo looking at her like that made her feel naked, as though all the lights in the universe had dimmed except the one directly above her head. The brunette looked coiled up, ready to pounce at a moment's notice.

Lauren felt her heart stop as the commander rose from her seat. But instead of fulfilling her wild fantasy, Bo extended her hand, "Good to have you on board Lauren. Before I go, any questions?"

She was playing with her, Lauren knew it. And just like a rat in the dangerously soft paws of a cat, she was letting it happen. Her throat was parched as she thought,  _Did you know? That we'd be meeting today?_

Lauren replied instead, "No, ma'am."

"And please, no need for that on board the Normandy, Lauren. Call me Bo, or Dennis, whichever is more comfortable for you."

The blonde smiled at the disregard of official procedure and saluted, retreating to the armoury.


	7. Split Screen Sadness

**2184 CE**  ::  **D27 Docks**  ::  **Normandy Interior**  -  **Crew Deck**

It was never easy for Lauren to make new friends, especially after the incident on Akuze. As per protocol, Normandy's crew were allowed shore leave in between missions while the ship was retrofitted but had to return to the ship at night. Lauren was already getting bored with the Citadel, so she spent most of her time on board, looking through the collection of weapons and equipment, reorganizing them for easier retrieval. She was used to being alone, growing to love it more each day.

Now faced with an entirely new crew -  _again_  - she forced herself to share meals with them in the crowded mess hall. While she enjoyed being by her lonesome, she knew she needed to get to know the people that surrounded her since she was going to be putting her life in their hands. Lauren listened as the crew recounted their tales and got the general idea that despite her odd, or lacking, tactics in dealing with matters of sex, Commander Dennis was very well loved by every member of the vessel.

"She specially went out to get us these supplies, you know," Mess Sergeant Trick hollered from behind the stove. "So you spoilt brats better thank her later."

Lauren stifled a grin, knowing that most on board the Normandy had been complaining about the food supply before having docked at the Citadel. The food was a far cry from the restaurants on the Silver Strip, one of the most elegant districts of the space station, but it was better than most frigates she had been on. The crew was in better spirits apparently, after Bo had gone out of the way to order a better grade of supplies. Lauren was thankful nonetheless.

When asked how long they've known her, the blonde was surprised to hear that it had been less than a year. But she supposed that made sense since friendships were forged in fire. A few of the original crew still remained, but most of them were new faces, eager to pick up the slack their predecessors had left. Lauren felt some sort of strange kinship with them.

"What about you, Lieutenant Lewis?" one of them asked. "Any exciting tales?"

Lauren balked, then smiled shyly. What could they have wanted to hear from her? Looking into her metal tray, as if searching for answers, Lauren tried to pretend she had not heard anything or had nothing to say.

"I heard you were on Akuze," an engineer commented.

Several gasps left the mouths of the crew members, and several more of them went pale. Lauren was not surprised they knew, word had spread about how a lone soldier returned from the jaws of death only to bravely throw herself back into battle, flipping death the ultimate bird. With a lack of reply, most of them had begun to excitedly talk amongst themselves with wild inaccuracies.

"Well, she saved my life once," the voice was soft but it cut through the din, silencing everyone.

Lauren looked up, her jaw went slack. "Ciara?"

The blonde soldier grinned and quickly padded over to her friend, wrapping her in a tight embrace. Settling down, Ciara begun to regale the mission on Antibaar and several more tales of when they both served on board the SSV Trafalgar, earning appropriate cheers and gulps. Lauren was thankful for the distraction of not retelling the most painful time of her life. She listened to the fairy queen, adding in some perspective when needed, and was just thoroughly enjoying herself.

Soon the night cycle came upon them, the ship's lights dimmed and everyone scattered off to their bunks. This left the two old comrades enjoying some brandy in the Starboard Observatory. The spirit was sweet and smooth, unlike Ryncol's trademark bitter burn. The two settled into a comfortable silence, each staring out the large pane of clear plexiglass and swirling the dark gold liquid in their mugs.

"Thank you," Lauren suddenly said.

Ciara shot her a knowing grin, understanding exactly what she was being thanked for.

Besides Tamsin, Ciara was one of Lauren's closest friends. The bright-eyed soldier joined the ranks of N7 a month after Lauren had graduated. Choosing the English blonde as the Gunnery Chief replacement on the Trafalgar was one of the best choices Lauren ever made. She had gained not only a confidante but Ciara's insight on many topics as well.

"Where did you go after the Trafalgar? Last I heard you were on Eden Prime when the purists decided to hijack the base."

"Those idiots from the Fae Liberation Front? They caused some trouble but nothing we couldn't handle," the fairy chuckled. "Spent three years there with my brothers, watching them rear spacecows."

"Must've killed you to leave the Trafalgar," Lauren joined the laughter.

"You have no idea! It was torture," her voice softened. "But I needed to be around family."

Lauren nodded in understanding. The physical injuries Ciara endured in Antibaar could heal as time passed, but the emotional scarring was difficult to pull through, especially since it was the first mission. While Lauren had fully embraced and relished in the close brush with death many times, for others it was a lifetime of therapy and planet-side service.

"So why did you join the Normandy?"

"You know, the stars always hold their allure," the fairy gestured at the view. "I couldn't be stuck on the ground forever, what kind of fairy would I be?"

Chuckling, they both clinked the metal mugs together. Lauren understood the sentiment fully, she could not imagine staying groundside even if Tamsin was in the picture. Tamsin would have never wanted her to remain stuck to a planet either. Between them, they had several hundred years left to fight the good fight and they had planned every second of it traversing the stars. Lauren momentarily closed her eyes, remembering Tamsin, and did not see the sympathetic smile that crossed Ciara's face.

"I'm sorry," Ciara reached over and covered the other woman's hand. "About Tamsin. She was a good woman."

The impact of Ciara's words somehow made the situation more real. It was not as if she had never considered the possibility but Lauren  _believed_  there was some other explanation for whatever happened between her plunging that syringe into her girlfriend's convulsing body and the moment she woke up at Huerta Memorial Hospital.

Still trying to fight it, Lauren shook her head, unsure of what to say. "I'm just glad you weren't there. It was," she swallowed, "It was horrible."

Tears had already begun to slide down her cheeks before she could stop them. Ciara shifted her arm to wrap around Lauren, gently patting her back, urging her to let the emotions out.

"She's gone, Ci," Lauren choked out. "She's gone and I wasn't even there the moment she left."

So Lauren cried, and cried some more. Whether it was seeing her friend again, or everything else that had happened in the past few days, she realized she needed it. She was thankful that most of the crew had gone to their bunks, leaving her alone with her old friend, only her wretched sobs punctuating the hum of the circulation vents.

* * *

Her eyes trailed after the brunette as she exited the elevator and joined the line to grab Trick's latest concoction. This morning it was a vegetarian frittata, something she guessed Bo did not like but was too polite to complain.

Lauren had been avoiding Bo like the plague. It was awkward being around her and feeling things she had thought were long buried. While slowly she had somewhat gotten used to her guilt, her heart had not seemed to thaw out just yet. She did not want any emotional entanglements at this particular juncture in her life, despite the delectable form it was in.

A bit of the omelette was caught in her throat when their eyes met and Bo shot her a smile. Trying to steady her breathing, Lauren pretended not to notice the commander until she was right next to her seat.

"Lauren."

"Ma'am," Lauren greeted, out of habit.

Bo raised an eyebrow at her, "I need to pick a few things up before we start."

"If you don't mind me asking,  _Bo_ ," the blonde corrected herself. "What are we starting on?"

"That briefing will be for when we leave."

Lauren nodded, "Okay, what do you need me to pick out?"

"Actually, I thought I'd go with you."

Half an hour later, they were shopping in the Commons. Lauren had not left the ship for days, and she felt like she had landed upon another bustling world full of fae and humans. Being a soldier longer than Bo, she advised her commander on the newest developments in weapons and technology. Slowly, the tension of being in the same breathing space as the beautiful brunette dissipated. She briefly wondered how Bo had managed to rise up the ranks so quickly, chastising herself for not using the past days to read up on her latest bed partner.

Suddenly, the speakers of hovering vid screen above the markets blared. The two soldiers looked up and scowled in disgust as they watched the screen flicker to life. An urgent report on the extranet was broadcasted across the Citadel: another attack on the colonies, another several hundred lives lost. Lauren winced as the footage of children screaming before the video went dark. The Council promised to punishment would be swift and severe to those that committed the atrocious crimes.

"Damn terrorists," the brunette shook her head.

Lauren nodded in agreement, "Thank the goddess it wasn't Eden Prime. Ciara's brothers are still there."

Bo stopped at a holovid store, "Oh yeah? How do you know her anyway?"

"We were on Antibaar together years ago. She's one of my best friends," Lauren scanned the racks of little discs. "Oh, take this one - it's good," Lauren reached across to grab at a copy of  _The Whys and Hows of Moonflies and Spacecows: A Documentary_.

Taking her time to return to her position, she inhaled the light scent of sweat and vanilla. She swallowed thickly as she remembered their tryst, lust pulsated through her. Bo shot her a look of surprise and Lauren felt herself blush.

"Sorry, I, uh - I just get excited about these things. Moonflies are not native to the moon, contrary to their name and popular belief. And despite the ethical concerns of the splicing of genes and recombining them to create something new, the spacecow is one of the rare animals that can supply - " the blonde stopped abruptly, her hands hung stiffly in the air.

The succubus' eyes had glazed over, a light blue hue colouring the usually dark eyes. Lauren chastised herself inwardly for babbling out of control, in front of her commander-slash-one-night-stand no less. Talk about awkward.

"Sorry," she laughed sheepishly, putting back the small disc.

"No, no. Spacecows, fascinating," there was no sarcasm in her smooth voice, just something that sounded terrifyingly close to adoration. "But I prefer this." Bo held out a copy of  _Halloween 16: The Re-remake_.

"I can't say that I've seen that one, or the 15 before it."

The brunette gasped in shock, "Well, you're missing out, Lieutenant Lewis."

"Aren't these things the same generic storyline where the first few seconds the hot girl dies and then the funny friend? Where's the value in that?"

Bo held a hand over her heart as though she had been wounded, "Blasphemy! I'll have you know that they are  _not_  all like that! They provide great insight to a killer's mind. Besides the second hottest girl usually lasts throughout the movie."

"Oh really?" Lauren asked slyly.

Bo turned to her, a mask of seriousness upon her face, "You sound like you don't believe me, Lieutenant."

Lauren only frowned, unsure how to reply and slightly mystified if she had offended the woman and her terrible taste in movies.

Bo kept a stern face as she spoke, "In that case, you're invited to my room for a viewing."

Lauren almost choked as she sputtered, "I'm sure I could just rea - "

"That's an order, Lieutenant."

A gulp. "Yes, ma'am."

"It's a date then!" Bo laughed gleefully.

Lauren relaxed immediately, realizing that the brunette was joking. The pair laughed as Bo walked out of the store. The blonde's eyes never strayed too far from the woman as she interacted with the store owners, her dimples enrapturing everyone around them. Even Lauren found herself staring after her, marvelling at the confident swagger Bo possessed. Her pistol followed the sway of her hip, jutting out a little and giving her a hint of danger. More than once, she found herself shuffling closer to the woman out of protective habit. At least that was what the blonde was telling herself.

Then Lauren's brain finally caught up with what she had said. Bo just declared their completely platonic movie viewing as a date. Sort of. The thought halted all her actions but the crowd behind her did not allow a moment for her to process. What was this woman doing to her? First the onslaught of guilt unleashed by a night of passion, then this level of charm…

The blonde gulped. Was this what the commander was like under all the layers of heroism? Lauren found her increasingly adorable, she was thankful that the woman was not trying to make things difficult between them. Mostly she just appreciated the friendship. Growing up not having friends and having the people she loved taken away from her time and time again, Lauren was not exactly the best at cultivating relationships. She preferred to rely on cold logic, syringes, and stun guns.

"I did some research on you," Bo jolted her out of her thoughts.

"Huh?" Lauren dumbly replied.

"Everything okay? I said I did some research on you," the brunette repeated, throwing Lauren a look over her shoulder.

"All good I hope," Lauren walked a little faster to compensate.

"I'm sure you've heard it before, but your records are impressive. Youngest medic to join the N7 program, part of Hackett's fab three, survivor of Akuze, just to name some."

The doctor wanted to flinch but heard the reverent tone and chose to nod shyly instead, "I could say the same about you, Saviour of the Citadel and the only unaligned fae in history."

Bo chuckled, waving the bestowed title away. "People always want to believe there's hope and having a hero keeps that hope alive."

She shook hands with a store owner before turning back to the blonde, saying, "But I'm no hero."

Lauren faced the brunette, meeting her eyes. "A hundred thousand people would disagree with that, Commander. We wouldn't be here right now if you didn't do what you did."

"But at what cost, Lauren?"

While the blonde had been prepared to answer to Bo's self-depreciation, she had no idea how to respond to  _guilt_. So she said nothing, but she found her hand atop the brunette's shoulder and looking deep into the brown eyes. For a moment, she peeked beneath the legend and the vulnerability she had inside.

"I should go, I have a briefing to get to."


End file.
